Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Day 26: Loveliness

When I think back to my childhood, my picture of "home" was many things. It wasn't always warm chocolate chip cookies when I got home from school, but it was sometimes. There weren't tons of presents at Christmas, but there were still so many surprises. It was a rugged picture of real, brokenness, chaos, struggle, support...but there was always love.

Being from a broken home, I convinced myself early on that I had it made...two families, two houses, two Christmases, two get the picture. It wasn't until later that I realized I would have told myself anything just to get through it. But, even as difficult as the split was, I always knew deep down, that the love in my home(s) was genuine.

Through the years, I have seen how easy it is to portray the picture of joy and celebration, hope and faith. But much more difficult to "celebrate" the failings. The hurt. The pain. The doubt and fear. It almost sounds like an oxymoron to even say that "c" word when you think of those wounds from the past. Though, I believe that when we join our voices together, we are truly encouraging and celebrating our lives, be it good or bad. Fun or...not so fun (for lack of a better word). There is good that comes through it, even though just to admit that sometimes brings tears to my eyes. I would have chosen a much different road to walk down if I could have, but yet, I wouldn't change a thing about where I am now.

Today is my mom's birthday. I'm celebrating her life, in ways that I can't even explain, but I know it's true. Last night while I was getting dinner ready, I told the kids that Grandma Beth's birthday would be today. It was the first year that my daughter started asking me questions about it. She's heard all the answers before, but never asked with such sincere interest. Here's the recap.

Me: Tomorrow is Grandma Beth's birthday.

River: Awww. How old would she have been?

Me: 61.

River: That's young! Did she die young?

Me: Yes.

River: How old was she again?

Me: 48.

River: 48?? That is young!!

Me: I was 21 and had just married Daddy.

River: Right after you got married?! That must have been really hard. Really painful.

Me: Yes, it was. But, God was with me, and even though it was really hard, he helped me get through it.

River: We'll have to sing her happy birthday to her tomorrow!

Me: I think so, too.

I know this doesn't really have to do anything with an artful event, except that I don't really believe that you can have an artful event in your home, without having love. If you just throw everything together, and even if it looks beautiful, without love, you'll be missing the most important thing of all. So here's my tip for today on artful events in your home...don't forget about love...even when it brings a tear to your eye to remember.